Showing posts with label adverbs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adverbs. Show all posts

Monday, March 19, 2012

Adverbs and Adjectives the Great Big Fish Said Monotonously

After reading the first few pages of  my manuscript my writing group targeted in on one weakness. There were others, but this was the first burr to be filed away. That weakness?
"-ly"

Adverbs are a tool in the expert writer's toolbox. However, Adverbs are also a tool in the novice writer's toolbox. And since the novice writer has less tools, we make use of our paltry supply a bit more often. Adjectives are in a similar box. Both of these modifiers have their place, and many new writers don't recognize that place. In this post I'm talking about adverbs.

I count myself among those novice writers, though perhaps less because I have had my weakness pointed out to me.

--I want to digress for a moment to talk about weaknesses. No matter how often we are told something, we will never accept it until we are mentally prepared. In developmental psychology we talk about scaffolding, schema theory, and i+1. I've heard about adverbs before, but I was never in a state to receive the information in any useful capacity. Learning to write, like anything else, is a process by which we slowly move forward gaining new insights and picking away imperfections as they push themselves to the surface like the chip of an eggshell caught in the white of your egg. It takes time to become a master. We should accept our current level and at the same time push ourselves on to the next.--

Back to adverbs.

Reading a sentence in which a squirrel, "ran quickly away from dogs" may be more interesting than "ran away from dogs." But the adverb is covering up the weakness of the verb. We can turn to the cabinet maker for an analogy. A veneer in woodworking is a thin layer of wood that is glued to the surface of another wood to change the appearance. You could, for example make a pine chest look like a teak chest. Many people like the thought of teak furniture. It's a harder wood. It's more expensive. It may be required to maintain social status. But if you just make a teak chest, then you won't need the veneering. Adverbs are the English language's veneer for weak verbs.

If we take this analogy a bit further (though not too far, as we know that any analogy breaks down when applied universally) then we can ask, "Why use a veneering at all?" That's a good question, and it applies to adverbs as well. A hardwood chest would be heavier than a softer wood, it's cheaper to use veneer, etc.

Adverbs have their use, but more often than not you may find that choosing the right verb will better serve your situation. As an exercise I searched my entire manuscript for "ly" and changed as many as I could. But how?

It may be better to say that the squirrel scrambled, scampered, dashed, bolted, zipped, darted, skittered, or any number of other verbs. This is great when writing fast paced action scenes where each word can cost you the entire scene. Alternatively you could describe the action that the adverb is intended to replace.

"They warily prodded at the wooden barrel." could easily be described as, "They first tapped the wooden barrel with the ends of their walking sticks and, when nothing happened, slid across the last few feet to examine it with their fingers." One sentence is simpler, lighter. While the other draws you further into the action. Which one is right? Unfortunately it depends on your goal for the scene. More often than not you'll want more immersion.

Use an adverb if necessary, or if you feel that it adds a flavor that you want. There are plenty of reasons to use adverbs, but just as many or more to avoid them. I'll leave you with some quotes.

"I think my mistakes were kind of common - leaning on cliches and adjectives in the place of clear, vivid writing. But at least I knew how to spell, which seems to be a rarity these days."

"I adore adverbs; they are the only qualifications I really much respect."

And of course:

"The road to hell is paved with adverbs."

Friday, March 16, 2012

Aaaand...Action!

Wow, there's a lot to say about writing action scenes. I mean really, a lot. And those are only three of the 907 million websites that google brought up for a search on "writing action."

To be fair, even though google does an amazing job (even scary sometimes) of knowing exactly what I'm searching for I'm pretty sure that all 907,000,000 of those sites are not completely relevant. And I'm sure that most of them cover pretty much the same ground. But it's an important topic that writers can stand to keep in mind.

And so here am I.

Writing action is essentially the process of tapping into our readers' fight or flight instincts so that they can:

  1. Have a primal physical and emotional reaction to our writing and thus become more connected to our story.
  2. Experience a bit of concern for our characters and thus become more connected to them.
  3. Stand up an cheer at our characters' ingenuity, skill, or luck and thus become more connected to them.
  4. See that the stakes for our characters are high and can be lost and thus become more connected to them.
Hmm....I think I see a pattern here. Though there are other reasons to write a cool action sequence one of the primary outcomes is a connection to character that we would not get otherwise. When I survive a brutal car wreck with my character, I bond with them. We've got something to talk about. Only they never talk back anymore.

So, how do we do it. I'll keep this short with a few points to think about and I may come back to this topic more in depth at a later date.

First, acting is reacting. This is a concept that I learned in theatre and it has served me well. It is echoed in this sentiment by Colin Powell, "No battle plan survives contact with the enemy." Action scenes are made up of planned actions as they come in contact with the unplanned events. Write these reactions. In fact, you can get a long way if you simply write out each party's reactions to the other's. 

"Dan hit Billy in the face. Billy rolled with the punch and kicked out with his left foot. Dan felt Billy's foot connect with his groin and the pain spread from there throughout his entire body. He fought the urge to wretch as he crumpled to the ground in pain. Billy watched Dan fall to the ground and let out an audible sigh. The fight was over, for now."

Of course this can become very sterile and boring like the fight scenes in the movie Far and Away before Tom Cruise's character shows up.

Another tip to keep in mind is to  be aware of the modifiers (e.g. adverbs and adjectives.) you use. Action scenes are supposed to move quickly. Cutting out unnecessary adverbs and adjectives can help to focus the reader on the action. Instead, concentrate on picking just the right verb or noun to convey the message. Instead of hit say slammed, pounded, crushed, etc. I'll talk about adverbs and adjectives another day.

Finally, keep the pacing up by focusing on the action. In a real fight, car wreck, accident you won't have enough time to look at the pretty flowers. That would be ridiculous. Douglas Adams uses this great effect by letting us in on the ponderous thoughts of a sperm whale as it falls to the surface of a planet. So keep most of your description for other scenes and during an action sequence try to imagine what your characters would notice.

Action scenes can be fun to write and read, but they can also be dreadful. Above all, make sure that when you read the scene YOU are interested the whole time.

Have fun writing.